Redditor Refuses to Dye Hair, Cover Tattoos for Sister’s Wedding in Viral Post

A feud broke out between a Redditor and her family after she rejected her sister’s wishes to cover her tattoos and pink hair for a wedding. The post that explained the situation—authored by u/Salty-Enthusiasm5986 on Reddit—has garnered more than 9,200 votes and 1,030 comments since it was posted on Tuesday.

In the now-viral post, Salty-Enthusiasm5986 explained that her sister was getting married and asked her to be a bridesmaid. She also explained that the dresses she picked for the bridesmaids were backless, pink and orange, and cost about $150.

“I’m not a fan of pink at all but it’s a dress, I can handle it,” the post read. “As usual in every wedding, if you’re a bridesmaid you’re expected to pay for the dress. The dress cost $150. That already for me is a huge sacrifice, paying $150 for a dress I’ll never wear again.”

Redditor Salty-Enthusiasm5986 then explained in the post that she has visible tattoos on her arm, hand, and back. She also mentioned that she had pink highlights mixed into her brown hair, but she wrote that her sister wasn’t a fan.

“My sister demands that I dye my hair brown and get rid of the pink highlights,” Salty-Enthusiasm5986 wrote. “She also demands I cover my tattoos with body makeup because she wouldn’t like having me with pink hair and tattoos in the wedding pictures and that bridesmaids are supposed to look classy.”

Redditor Salty-Enthusiasm5986 also said her sister told her that if she kept her pink hair and didn’t cover her tattoos that people would focus more on her “crazy style than the bride and groom.”

The post explained that Salty-Enthusiasm5986 told her sister she would not be doing either of those things. She said her sister got upset and told her to understand where she was coming from as the bride.

“‘What do you mean you’re not?'” the Redditor said her sister replied. “‘You bought a dress you hated and you have an objection on temporarily hiding your tattoos and dyeing your hair? It’s not like you can’t dye your highlights back after the wedding is over, try to understand where I’m coming from.'”

In the post, Salty-Enthusiasm5986 said she replied to her sister that she asked her to be a bridesmaid knowing what she looked like. She explained that “this is how I love myself and its insulting how you expect me to change myself like this so you can have your picture perfect wedding.”

The post also said she told her sister that she bought the dress because it wasn’t a big deal but that she would not pretend to be somebody else for one day just because her sister wanted her to. She also told her sister that she’s “been like this for years” and asked why she was “suddenly surprised” by the tattoos and highlights.

Redditor Salty-Enthusiasm5986 said her sister replied that she didn’t think she would “throw a tantrum” over tattoos and hair. She also said that it was her wedding so of course, she wanted it to be perfect.

“You either go with it or you’re out of the bridal party,” the sister said to Salty-Enthusiasm5986 according to the post.

The post explained that Salty-Enthusiasm5986 told her sister that she quit the bridal party because the wedding was “not that important to me to lead me to a point of changing myself.”

She told her sister to either accept her as she was but that she couldn’t expect her to change herself because she worried about not having a “classy wedding” because of her appearance.

“Since then my parents and my brother have called me and cursed me out for not honoring my sister’s wishes. AITA???” Salty-Enthusiasm5986 asked at the end of the post.

A common debate surrounding weddings is what costs the bride and groom should handle. For example, The Knot, a wedding planning website, said it is expected for members of the bridal party to cover the cost of their own dress, bridal gifts, bachelorette party, wedding travel and hotel arrangements.

The bride and groom should be responsible for bouquets, corsages, hair and makeup, and wedding day accommodations, according to The Knot.

wedding, love, marriage, stock
A Redditor’s post went viral detailing how she rejected her sister’s wishes to cover her tattoos and dye her hair for a wedding. The Redditor said the wedding was “not that important to me to lead me to a point of changing myself.”

Many users ran to the comments section of the now-viral post to support and offer advice to the Redditor.

“NTA. It’s not about how much you can or you can’t do for the wedding. It’s about not being accepted and loved as you are,” one user commented. “You are not a prop.”

Redditor Salty-Enthusiasm5986 replied to the comment that what bothered her the most was being told to change her appearance for the wedding. She explained it was “very insulting” because it felt like her sister told her she wouldn’t accept her for who she truly was. She also said in the comment that her sister “tried to play me like I’m some doll.”

“I’ve said this before but a lot of brides don’t want people at their weddings, they want background actors,” another person mentioned in the comments. “If her condition for being a bridesmaid is looking as unlike you as possible maybe she should ask someone who isn’t you to do it or just appreciate the time, money and energy that you’ve already been willing to devote to her instead of demanding more.”

Other users recalled similar experiences where they quit a wedding party due to unrealistic expectations and costs.

“I bailed on my sister’s wedding party over the cost of the tux rental,” a user wrote. “I was unemployed, had just moved halfway across the country, and didn’t have 500 bucks to spend on a tux rental. Felt no guilt.”

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